slice of life
Mood: Touch me again and I will permanently impair your ability to have children.
04:36 p.m. - Tuesday, June 4, 2002 - [Comment?]
Unloved. The word struck her and it felt cold.
08:55 p.m. - Monday, June 3, 2002 - [Comment?]
I am drowning inside my head. Being suffocated by the cacaphony of my own thoughts. Words are blood and they are flowing freely from my pen. There is no form and no method to what I write. A shadowy bird is spreading its wings inside me as I peer into the dark.
(What's going on? I am so very cold.)
This place place is quiet and the color of twilight. Hush, beloved. I want to know where I am going. I want to know why I am here. I want to break away.
Sometimes I think reality depends on my mood. I want to know who you are.
There is a storm inside me. And I think it's spilling over.
Can you swim
I don't understand myself today. I don't think I will tomorrow either.
Tomorrow is such a childish word.
Who am I to you? Who am I to me? Who am I to anybody? I am so tired.
My life is full of crossed out phrases and misspelled words. The fire is dying.
Sometimes I can't seem to find my way back home. But do I really want to go home?
I need someone to talk to. Someone who won't invade my head. Not you. Oh, no, never you.
Stop laughing at me.
Amazing grace. Oh, how sweet the sound.
And yet I don't feel any better.
11:25 p.m. - Sunday, June 2, 2002 - [Comment?]
The need for silence is like an unquenched thirst.
07:50 a.m. - Friday, May 24, 2002 - [Comment?]
Be not far from me, beloved.
I can feel the tide shifting and I know I cannot reach the shore. I do not feel you near. I am alone in the dark ocean.
There will be no rescue.
11:17 a.m. - Saturday, May 18, 2002 - [Comment?]
So you've lost interest, have you? Not surprising, really. It's in your nature to do that. You coulde be less abrupt about it, though, you know.
I never really expected you to stick around too long. I rather know you too well. I know I can be interesting sometimes, too. I'm just not always sure what can hold your interest.
Apparently I've misjudged, this time.
Yes, I'm quite venemous, enchanting little toad that I am.
11:13 a.m. - Saturday, May 18, 2002 - [Comment?]
They glow, your eyes of smoke, my dark one, my lovely one. I am so far away yet I can still see you through the night. I can feel the waves pounding through your veins. Still I am shorebound. Sand is soft and cool beneath me. Salt water sweeps over my outstretched hand, tickling my fingers as it retreats. It is so very cold tonight.
Where are you? I can see you.
But you are not here.
09:59 p.m. - Thursday, May 16, 2002 - [Comment?]
The waves are silent beneath me. The color of your breath fans out around me and I am surrounded by a susurrus of sighs. Wild things hide in the midsummer night. You are among them. I know and I am somewhere far away in years and tears and space. Time is a barrier to the most determined. I cannot move the distance that separates us. I do not know what to do, my love.
I am afraid you are alone.
12:10 p.m. - Monday, May 13, 2002 - [Comment?]
Dusk. Quiet, and moist. The vague expectancy that preceedes a storm. It comes slowly, softly. Water from the sky like tears from forgotten gods. The pieces that shiver and shake in the wind. A cooling force that slides down gentle faces and sinks into souls. It is not silence that prevails but simple lack of sound. Eyes the color of rain that stare blindly into the clouds while the droplets fall into them. The way I do.
08:21 a.m. - Thursday, May 9, 2002 - [Comment?]
You know this isn't what I want.
06:07 p.m. - Tuesday, May 7, 2002 - [Comment?]
a place in the sun (all i ever wanted)
It's warm here. The light presses against my skin and I am content.
10:37 p.m. - Monday, May 6, 2002 - [Comment?]
A moment in time. The sun on my transparant limbs. The feeling of warmth swimming through me. Like light in my veins. I am illumed. I am like an afterimage glowing beneath your eyelids. You are branded. You will always remember.
05:01 p.m. - Monday, May 6, 2002 - [Comment?]
& I am lost here in the wandering for I have no direction and no detail. All is a vague and shapeless scene, a startled dreamscape that twists and melts. I cannot seem to reach far enough to take your hand. Please do not tell me that this is my fault. I have slipped between the cracks to the this dark and silent place.
04:43 p.m. - Monday, May 6, 2002 - [Comment?]
On new beginnings
There is too much space between us, they say. Some how you always agree.
08:10 a.m. - Monday, May 6, 2002 - [Comment?]